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TallOrder88

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What am I?
« on: September 07, 2020, 12:38:29 am »
What am I?



What am I?

1. not you, or your projection of what you think I should be

2. A being, that's alive, and therefore has basic needs, emotional needs, nutritional needs, spiritual needs, just like others.

3. Misunderstood, I've also learned people, many, deliberately misunderstand you as a way of protecting their flawed view of just about everything.
People are comforted by what they feel is right, even if it's wrong....like a horse running back into a burning barn.

4. Kind, gentle and loving

5. Fair and objective

6. A thinker


I know what I am, have a track record to prove it, the problem is society, people, individuals won't allow you to be 'you', instead they can't help but cast nasty aspersions upon you to fit their own inner flaws, not my own.

Smart people, fair people, even Holy people, 'validate', rather than assume.

People who 'assume', are owned by, or used by demons to hurt others.

Who am I?

To be continued.
« Last Edit: January 25, 2021, 07:54:39 pm by TallOrder88 »
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TallOrder88

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Re: What am I?
« Reply #1 on: September 21, 2020, 09:45:30 pm »
Why some are more fearful of Heaven than Hell

https://alteredstatesdotblog.wordpress.com/2020/09/21/not-sure-if-i-want-heaven-to-be-my-destination-heres-why/

Altered States blog post, very good and deep read about how dishonest people make life a living hell for honest types, and how religion often used as tool to do so.
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TallOrder88

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Re: What am I?
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2020, 07:25:32 am »
Art allows you, us, to take a vacation within ourselves



Art allows you, us, to take vacations within ourselves.

The above is 'me', and no, I don't look like that or reflect that image in every day life, not even, although wouldn't mind if I did, cause if did would be more at peace and people would be more at peace with me, in that above image is probably a better reflection of who I am, I mean I'm already that, but no one sees it.

In the above portrait I feel like a 'Maria' for some reason, a Puerto Rican gal, looking over a balcony somewhere just pondering about life, the future and self.

Young, hungry and still a bit curious about life.

We've all been there, some are still there.

If not for art, and able to project all sides, I think I'd go 'mad', although I'm sure some already think I'm already insanely mad.

I assure you I'm not though, I just don't allow 'flesh' to always define who or what I am.

Sometimes I do, when role requires it, but when a lone, I play no role, other than to comfort self, and I often do that by allowing other sides within to breathe, peer out, and relax.

Thank goodness for art.
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TallOrder88

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Re: What am I?
« Reply #3 on: October 05, 2020, 03:30:59 pm »
What am I?, today I feel I'm a defeated foe, moral low and absolutely sucks

 

Sometimes I think getting smacked around and beat up is less painful or harmful, than getting attacked in other ways, that don't leave physical scars, but that damage your moral, self esteem, sense of worth and more.

When you get beat up (lightly), whether in play or a light tussle, it's usually not all that personal, it's not really an attack on your inner self, but getting spiritually beat up, or damaged in psychological ways, well, it feels a lot more personal and the pain from those kind of attacks can last a life time or really effect your long term mood.

People who commit suicide don't do so because they got beat up one night at a bar, or on the streets, that's usually laughed off....no rather people who commit suicide, who suffer from depression, do so for the deeper reasons I mentioned above...mainly neglect...emotional and social neglect, or even fiscal neglect.

If I could walk into a boxing ring tonight, or even a wrestling ring, and get 'tossed' around, I'd leave actually feeling better about self...even if got clobbered by opponent, their clobbering me would be more affection than myself, and others, get now.

Only so very few will get that, and if you don't get it, than be glad you don't, means your life is OK.

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TallOrder88

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Re: What am I?
« Reply #4 on: February 23, 2021, 10:57:27 am »
Just depends on mood and time of day I guess

When single, not in a relationship with any other or others, than you're many things to self, you become a whole society within yourself as a way of providing the balance that nature seeks.

Sometimes I'm masculine, other times more fem, sometimes I can be girly, other times boyish, sometimes I can be real serious, other times silly as a rabbit, and so forth, and that applies to looks also.

When I go out, I dress and look as society would expect someone like me to, at least mainstream day time society, but when alone, in place all alone, I can become more plural or broad in how I dress or present self to self as a way of providing comfort.

Now if married or never been single for more than 1 year, none of the above will make much sense to you, or actually it will, but you'll fake like it does.

Actually just now, I wish I could write a whole movie skit based on one character who's a bit of everything, and the movie would evolve around like 6 inner styles within this character that come out during certain times of the day or moods, situation ect.

If I were a millionaire, there's so many storylines I'd turn into screen plays.

Who am I?...obviously not a millionaire, darn.
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